Warning: Slightly annoyed Gen Y mother rant ahead.
Recently I came across a status on Facebook, a Generation X mother to be exact, asking the question of whether or not Gen Y parents are extremely different.
This is a mother that I respect (still do) because of her achievements as an entrepreneur, her great topics and advice as a mother and her friendly online disposition.
Okay, my first reaction was to say, "Of course we are! We are a whole decade younger and a lot has changed in our culture since then. And what does that have to do with our parenting? What does it matter?"
But instead, being the non-confrontational type that my mama raised, I remained silent. I needed to let this stew in my brain for a bit. And stewing it has.
I'm so sick of being silent.
Heck, I'm freaking tired of the older generations judging the Gen Y'ers, especially when it comes to parenting.
I'm not upset at this mother for this question because after all, she wasn't judging she was simply asking, but what bothered me were the replies she received (all of which are Gen X parents).
There was even one comment where the mother stated she was saddened at the fact that Gen Y'ers are becoming parents. Really?
I probably read less than a handful of fair and just replies that didn't offend me at all. The rest made for instant eye rolls.
Just so you all know, I am 29 years old (as is my husband), we both got married very young at 23, had our first child at 25 and second recently this year. We are Gen Y.
According to Wikipedia, Generation Y, also known as the Millennial Generation is the demographic cohort following Generation X. There are no precise dates for when Generation Y starts and ends. Commentators use beginning birth dates from the latter 1970s, or from the early 1980s to the early 2000s (decade).
For the record, my husband and I have accomplished pretty much many of the amazing things in life courtesy of hard work, determination, and humbleness.
Just because we started our lives together at a young age, didn't mean we stopped living life and doing what we needed to do for ourselves.
We are well educated, have successfully saved our own money throughout the years to purchase and own a beautiful home, have traveled, continue to travel, birthed (well I did) and brought 2 beautiful and thriving children into this world.
I home-school my daughter and we take her to extra-curricular activities to keep her mind and body moving -- does she own and do we allow her to play on a Wii or tablet (most often reading e-books, problem-solving games and art), YES, yes she does.
When we're on long road trips or sitting at the doctor's office after she grows tired of reading a picture book or colouring with crayons or playing "Spot the Red Cars" with me and daddy, do we yell at her to stop when she wants to watch a movie or her favourite show or have some fun on one of our electronic devices?
No we don't.
After all, it is 2013 and we are living in a world surrounded by technology.
Our children need to know this stuff, it's what our culture and society has evolved into.
It's Technological Determinism.
You can't stop progress; there's so much value in technology.
However, having said that, we also believe there is also a heck of a lot of value in doing things the way we did as children.
We pride ourselves on our daughter taking part in physical sports and the arts.
Through this all, I continue to raise my children to be the humble, sweet, hard-working and appreciative children that my mother raised me to be.
This has nothing to do with what generation you're from.
Each generation is shaped by their unique experiences that they've had growing up and they have developed their own ideas about what's important to them at work and in their personal life.
The differences between the generations are really the basis for how they interact with others and how they judge others' behaviors and performance.
"Gen Y thinks Gen X is a bunch of whiners. Gen X sees Gen Y as arrogant and entitled,…and everyone thinks the Baby Boomers are self-absorbed workaholics."
The biggest mistake in business and life is treating everybody the same.
"We keep trying to pound square pegs in round holes."
- Bill Haas of Haas Performance Consulting L.L.C
Accept differences and stop the judging already. Different is not wrong, different is just different.
It's 2:25 A.M.
I am glad I got that off my shoulders.
I shall attempt to get some sleep with some Songza Bedtime Indie Acoustics on my iPhone.
Good night.
7 comments:
This is a very good and eye-opening post, Carol.
I'm not a mother, but I can identify with this well as a Gen Y in the workplace.
I work with a lot of gen x'ers and our views how we operate can be quite different at times, but at the end of the day we have the same goal in mind.
I like how you say "Different is not wrong; different is just different." And also how clever of a word: GENERACISM.
It definitely feels like it.
I'm sorry on behalf of those that may have judged you in any way as a gen y mother.... from what I've seen so far you are an amazing mom that has achieved a whole lot ... before 30! Hats of to you, Carol! You have every right to be proud.
Thanks for the insightful post!
I'm a Gen X Parent with a Baby Boomer Husband. We have chatted about this same thing a few weeks back and in all honesty, yes I did find myself being a tad judgmental towards the Gen Y Parent. I have encountered many instances with them at my children's classes, at the grocery store, work, etc. and as much as their parenting style *not all, most* may be questionable at times, this post has truly helped me see a different side to it. And you are right, we are all different no matter the generation and it all depends on our own personal experiences and how we were raised. Wonderful post.
It doesn't matter what generation you're from..... parents are parents. We love our kids, we do what's best for them, who the heck are we to judge one another based on what year we were born?
As a fellow Gen Y parent, I feel your pain about being sick and tired of the unnecessary judgement. We can't stand still or move with our children without being questioned about our parenting skills it seems. I agree it doesn't matter what generation we're from, at the end of the day, the ultimate goal of parenting is to raise functional, self-sufficient human beings who contribute more positively than negatively in this world.
Great post!
i treat people the way they treat me. Until we can get along then will switch to treating others as I would want to be treated.
Jobs and behavior ... if you feel u like me cool. I treat u with respect. If you feel that ur superior over me because ur
fill in the blank then.... byyyyyyyyyyeeeeee byyyyyeeeeeee!!!!!!!!
other than Church, my own peace and being happy doing my work at my job. & liking me that's all I am going to do.
right is right... fair is fair.
Jennifer
I agree with you. I am a Gen X parent and I only feel pride about the next generation. I expect them to be different. That was the point of raising the next generation differently. They are also dealing with a new set of circumstances. I AM sad about Gen Y becoming parents because that means my baby is growing up.
I think the key is still teaching your children the basic manners of how to treat others and their surroundings...I am a teacher (Gen Y...but don't really like that label) and am shocked at some of the manners kids have nowadays...
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